You made me cry and you don't even care
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Randomize
