ya dads aren't the best wingmen
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
