1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
