For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
