we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Randomize
