You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Randomize
