people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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