The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
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