Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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