Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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