If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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