i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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