update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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