either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
