I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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