Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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