***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
im drinking this country out of the recession.
You need to stop texting me at SEVEN in the morning. It wakes my one night stands up and makes for the awkward talk way too early.
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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