my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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