ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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