yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
It was like giving head to a cactus.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
