really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
