oh god the rape fog is back!
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
