I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
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