It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
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