I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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