I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
