Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
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