Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Randomize
