Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
