Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
