you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I can't believe I left out the part about him peeing on the side of Route 2 at 3 a.m. while wearing a dress.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
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