i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Randomize
