if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
