no, he came in my armpit
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
