Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
