She's JV to your varsity
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
