Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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