if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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