Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize