My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
Dear god my vagina.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
Randomize
