my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Just high enough for therapy.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
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