i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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