can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
