I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
