weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
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