Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
