Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Randomize
