I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Randomize
