god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
