If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Randomize
